Steven Bauer, Oral History

Recorded: September 27, 2018

Interviewed by Lae'l Hughes-Watkins

Transcribed by the Kent State University Research & Evaluation Bureau

Note: This transcript includes geo-references to locations that are discussed in the oral history. Geographical names linked in the transcript will open in a new window or tab that takes you to that location information and map in the Mapping May 4 project. To request a transcript without geo-reference links included, please contact Kent State University Special Collections & Archives.

[Interviewer]: This is Lae'l Hughes-Watkins, speaking on September 27th, 2018 at Kent State University Special Collections and Archives as part of the May 4 Oral History Project. Today I will be talking with Steven Bauer. Steven, I would like to start with a few biographical questions, try to get to know you a little bit better. First, where were you born?

[Steven Bauer]: Ravenna, Ohio.

[Interviewer]: And where did you grow up?

[Steven Bauer]: Kent, Ohio.

[Interviewer]: Is your family also from Kent, Ohio?

[Steven Bauer]: Yes.

[Interviewer]: And where did you attend high school?

[Steven Bauer]: Kent Roosevelt, class of ’71.

[Interviewer]: Class of ’71. So as a high school student, do you recall if you had any specific perceptions or feelings about Kent State University?

[Steven Bauer]: Yeah, that’s a great question because I think growing up in a college town, you grew up fast because you watched—I lived a couple blocks from campus by the married students' apartments when they were here. Then you walked and rode your bike through the campus and I remember when they built this building, and you just watch what the college kids did, when—like we talked about the bell bottoms, even when penny loafers came in, you know, the collegiate look, that's what you wanted to be—collegiate, you know, and then as time went on, it was like wow, you want to grow your hair, and The Beatles, and all that. But campus was just always a thing that you tried to live up to even if you were young and weren’t in school—in college yet. Then, you know, just the whole vibe of Kent was such a great place to grow up back then. The music was unreal, you know. I mean everything was just—I listened to Joe Walsh at the Fifth Quarter, and it was just a fabulous place.

[Interviewer]: Thank you. Now if you can, if any of this sounds familiar, the late ‘60s, there were a lot of protests taking place on Kent State campus, do you ever recall if your family expressed any opinions about those protests or that kind of atmosphere?

[Steven Bauer]: You know, they weren’t real—they were Democrats, so they were a little more liberal. Of course they didn’t want you to grow your hair, they didn’t want you to—I think tight jeans were popular at one time, you know, all that type of stuff, but they weren’t—either way, they were like—the day that that happened and I came back home, I was with my neighbor and he said they should’ve shot every last one of them.

[Interviewer]: We’ve heard that many times.

[Steven Bauer]: And my father was not saying that.  

[Interviewer]: So along those same lines, do you remember if your family or other townspeople spoke about the Vietnam War, their feelings?

[Steven Bauer]: Yes, I mean because it was on TV every night, the head count, you know, of how many people died, and the different things. So, yeah, people talked about it. I might add that, as far as Students for Democratic Society, I remember riding in a car, and it must’ve been ’69, and I was with people from here, Kent. You know, high school kids. And there was an SDS club, or whatever, affiliation, at the high school during that time, and they talked about a Midwestern school that they were looking for as a focal point, you know, to protest the Vietnam War, and that Kent could be one of them.

[Interviewer]: Really?

[Steven Bauer]: Yeah. That’s a very vivid memory before this happened, you know, that weekend.

[Interviewer]: How did you end up in the car?

[Steven Bauer]: I can’t tell you, you know, who I was with, I don’t know the time—it had to be ’69 because it was before ’70.

[Interviewer]: Did you tell your parents that story?

[Steven Bauer]: Probably not.

[Interviewer]: So, as a high school student, I’m gonna kind of fast forward a little. Do you remember about the announcement when President Nixon said we’re going into Cambodia, on that April 30th date and the ROTC Building burning—

[Steven Bauer]: Yes.   

[Interviewer]: If you could share your—

[Steven Bauer]: I think I heard it because the Friday night of when it started downtown, I was in Columbus at a Vocational Industrial Clubs of America meeting, because that’s what part of the high school I was going to was vocational part. We were there Friday and then remember hearing, you know, on the radio and then people calling us. Of course, there’s no cell phones back then, and people talking about how they wrecked the town. But right after that announcement, I also remember, even before I went down to Columbus that Thursday or Friday, because I was only down there one night—we hauled butt back up here on Saturday morning once we heard everything happened. But I remember people spray painting, "Out of Cambodia," "Free Bobby Seale," I mean all the different things, and I saw it on different buildings, graffiti and stuff.

[Interviewer]: On that evening or the next day?

[Steven Bauer]: Probably afterwards, because I don’t know when Nixon—did he announce it that week? I don’t know the approximate day.

[Interviewer]: April 30th.

[Steven Bauer]: Yeah.

[Interviewer]: Do you remember your feelings or any commentary from your parents at the arrival of National Guard in Kent that weekend?

[Steven Bauer]: The arrival?

[Interviewer]: When the National Guard actually came into the city of Kent after.

[Steven Bauer]: Oh yes, they were very protective, “Don’t you go out, don’t you go out there,” they wouldn’t  let me go out Saturday night to watch the—I watched the ROTC Building burn from my bathroom—second floor bathroom window and I had friends over and they, “Let’s go up there,” and my parents wouldn’t let me go out. So, that was on Saturday. I mean of course Saturday during the day I went and looked downtown at all the broken windows and the chaos that happened the night before.

[Interviewer]: Were neighbors coming over, having conversations?

[Steven Bauer]: Yes, oh yes. Everybody was like, you know, and so it was a real big thing. I also remember I used to mow lawns, and I went to get gasoline, this was probably that Saturday, and they were like, “What are you gonna use that for?” You know.

[Interviewer]: Who asked you?

[Steven Bauer]: The person at the gas station, because I was filling up a can full of gas for the lawn mower and it was real you know, “What are you doing with that,” you know.

[Interviewer]: Going now to May 1 through May 4, what were your recollections from that time period, May 1 through May 4?

[Steven Bauer]: So May 1 was Friday, right?

[Interviewer]: Yes, because the 4th was that Monday.

[Steven Bauer]: Yep, yep. So May 1, I was in Columbus for Friday night, and then spent the night there and then May 2nd is—May 2nd is Saturday and that’s when we came back here, and I was with a friend of mine who was also with me May 4th, maybe even another friend, two friends at that point, and then we just got back here and looked at everything and were freaked out, and you know, as a child, or more or less a child, I was 17, I believe, in ’70, yeah in July of ’70 I was probably 17. So, it was very impressionable, you know, that your hometown was being destructed, just destruction, and of course the whole music, the background of the protest and the Vietnam war, the knowing that when I graduated from high school I’d probably get drafted—might get drafted, it was a real big heavy thing.  

[Interviewer]: Do you have any recollections specifically when the shootings occurred on that May 4th?

[Steven Bauer]: Oh big time, yeah. So Saturday watched the ROTC building, Sunday came up here and my parents—we weren’t totally under the martial law thing, I can’t remember, but my parents let me out and of course I was a couple blocks from campus, could go through the woods here and my house was over there, and so I walked over here with friends and I remember seeing the Guard, I actually—and I don’t know if this is from the picture or my recollection, saw that the girl put the flower in the guy’s barrel, that's a famous picture. I don’t know, it’s so long ago, but that was on Sunday because it was a nice day also, and just seeing the Guard. And then watching, it was amazing watching the tanks and the vehicles go over curbs and the curbs would just crush, you know, the cement would just turn to powder. And the helicopters overhead, I mean it was fascinating when you’re that young and watching all that, and just seeing the Guardsman. Of course they looked like college kids and they were tired from the strike they came in on, and I kinda recollect that from the news. It was just wild, you know, that whole scene.

So that leads you into May 4th. And so I think Sunday night they burned something out on Summit Street, they burned something. I don’t know if it was a barn, but it was a structure.

[Interviewer]: I have heard the story about the barn.

[Steven Bauer]: Yeah. I remember that happening and then again, the parents being very protective at night, not letting me go out. So then we got up Monday morning and wow—it wasn’t a big thing yet, total big thing, and went to school, and I went to school at Depeyster, where Depeyster—old Depeyster School, I went to school half days in the gymnasium there because I was in a drafting—you know drawing, drafting program, and we went there. We went to Roosevelt then we went to Depeyster’s gym for half days. So we’re closer to campus and we say, “Well, let’s go up,” and I think it was Burger Chef that was there, “Let’s go up and eat burgers and look at the Guard for our noon hour.” So, that’s what we did, and there was maybe four of us.

[Interviewer]: So you were allowed to take—that’s just you going on lunch or were you sneaking?

[Steven Bauer]: Yeah, I mean no, we were allowed to go wherever we wanted, people would go out and smoke cigarettes, we were not hoodlums but that time of your life. We walked up to the campus, got our burgers, and we said, “Well, let’s bring them over to the campus and eat on a bench or just eat on the grass,” because it was a nice day for May, early May. So we walked over—the student union used to be—in the old student union, and I remember going in there and then we saw the fliers about a rally at noon, because this must’ve been 11:00 or so, or 11:30. And we go, “Wow, yeah.” Of course, the student union was right there and then the Victory Bell was right over here. So we go “Wow, let’s go out there.” I think we were done eating our lunch by that time, we weren’t eating it out there. But we walked out there and that’s when everything happened, and it happened very fast as it goes through my vivid memory here. It was like first the bell, heard the bell ringing. I remember the person on top of the bell. I remember the Guard forming their line. And we just sat there like—again going back—growing up in Kent, Ohio, you tried to emulate being older, being next to a campus. There we were acting like we were students and we were protesting the Vietnam War and we’re right along with them. Of course, we were juniors in high school—and I think that’s the only people—there’s very few people—I talked to a couple that were there that day confronted with fixed bayonets and that’s the vivid memory I have, is sitting there and then doing this.

[Interviewer]: Two middle fingers.

[Steven Bauer]: Yes, two, just like they were. You know, chanting, “F.U. pigs.” We were right there with them. I remember them fixing their bayonets, putting on their gas masks, going around—and the jeep came out and told us to disperse. So, I was in that crowd. That took maybe another—I don’t know the timeline, maybe ten minutes before they shot tear gas. We knew they were gonna shoot tear gas because they had their masks on by that time. But we watched all that happen, and I swear it was within 20 minutes to a half hour. They put on their gas masks, they fixed bayonets, they told us to disperse, and it was an illegal gathering, and the next thing I know, they were marching towards us.

As they got closer and as the tear gas came, the crowd was starting to disperse, so part of the crowd went up the hill and—was that Blanket Hill, is that what they called it? Yeah. And then went up Blanket Hill, up towards Taylor Hall, and then we stayed at the bottom and then the biggest thing that I reflect on—and we had this conversation beforehand—was I was with a friend, and again we were juniors in high school and he was pretty wild dude, and he picked up a canister of tear gas, and I don’t know if he just put his coat over his face or what, and he threw it back. I’m going, “Dude, wow,” you know, this is wild. And that’s when I kinda got scared, and he threw it back and then we ran back to school. So, not until we got back to Depeyster, the gymnasium where our classroom was, that we—can I—remember hearing the shots because that happened at what time—I don’t know the exact time. But I think we were too far away to hear the shots by that time, because we weren’t at the bottom of the hill. To this day I praise the Lord that I didn’t go up the hill and go that route. Or, went around and then ended up in the parking lot. But Depeyster’s the other way, so we just crossed 59 [State Route 59] and went up whatever side street to Crain Avenue and back down to Depeyster School. So, that’s the biggest vivid memory that I have of the whole situation, you know, the—just the atmosphere of the tear gas, the fixed bayonets, we didn’t know the guns were loaded, I think they were M1s. And they were coming towards us. A lot of the kids were brave, you know, not only my friend that threw the tear gas back.

I guess it would be time to mention that person that threw the tear gas back left school, I guess that was May, probably that summer, or I think in the fall, didn’t come back to school. And he was old enough to join the Army, volunteered for the Army, and did, I believe, two tours or at least one tour in Vietnam, and was a door gunner, very young. And he had a wife—I don’t think he was married till he came back—but he went over there, he came back, and he wasn’t the same person like a lot of people were. Because I ended up getting drafted in ’71 in the lottery, I was number 22, so I was going to the Army within 30 days. This guy was, I think—John was already in the Army. And then my dad said, “No way.” I said, “Well, I’m gonna just join the Marines.” And then he goes, “No, you’re not,” and he brought me over to Akron and I joined the Navy, Navy Reserve on the first billet I could get. Of course, my chance—and you couldn’t get into the National Guard or the Army Reserve by that time, because everybody was going to that versus regular army and getting shipped out. So, the Navy was a lot better place.

But going back to my friend, so he came back, I came back from after 2 years in the Navy, stateside all assignments, shore duty, actually, never was on a ship. (Laughs) Which, wow. I came back, I remember he came back, and you know, we were veterans and we still were friends, and this gentleman told us in The Loft downtown that he had a gun and he was gonna kill himself. That was like a Sunday or Saturday, and, on Monday, I believe, I came home and my father said, “I got bad news.” And he had shot himself. He rented a hotel that’s still there out across from Twin Star Lanes bowling alley, there’s a motel there that’s still in pretty good shape, on 59, and he rented a room and blew his head off.

[Interviewer]: This is the friend that threw the—?

[Steven Bauer]: Yeah, threw the tear gas back and joined the Army. Totally messed him up. By that time he had a wife and child, so it was very sad. Now, there was problems there. His brother committed suicide a couple years before that, so there was a lot of emotion. I’m sure him going through the riots, then going to ‘Nam, you talk about going crazy in your head. So, that was probably the biggest thing as a result of going through May 4th that left an impression on my mind, plus getting drafted, I mean I didn’t know I was gonna get a low lottery number, 22. And I think, at that time, the kids don’t realize this now, it’s like a prison sentence because I didn’t have enough money and my parents didn’t have enough money to send me to school for a school deferment. So you’re stuck, it’s like, “Hey, you’re going to ‘Nam.” Or you might luck out and not go to ‘Nam. But chances are, you’re going to ‘Nam. And chances are I’m gonna get drafted because I was [number] 22. Within 30 days of that lottery "party," (laughs) I had my notice to go to Cleveland and take a physical.

[Interviewer]: So there’s no financial aid or, as you’re saying that your parents—?

[Steven Bauer]: I didn’t—I wasn’t college prep material, I mean I didn’t really have a desire to go to college, my parents didn’t have the money, so I didn’t really look into that. I did look into, this is interesting, because there was a—it’s called—you’ll tell me. It was called The Center for Peaceful Change. Now it’s—?

[Interviewer]: It's not the center actually, it’s an actual program.

[Steven Bauer]: Yeah, yeah, it’s a program now. Because I took a negotiation class a couple years ago and I was telling my story and they go, “Well, that’s the department that this is.” So, I went up there—they would help you get to Canada (laughs) or give you an idea of what it was like since we were so near Canada. But I decided not to do that because, you know—family—and the best way to get out of town, the easy way is to join the military. Somebody else pays for it, you got three meals and a cot. So, I ended up enlisting. I was just very lucky not to have to go over there, I think it would’ve changed my, you know, whole life. Very grateful.

[Interviewer]: I did want to rewind for just a moment, when you, as a high school student, you were on Blanket Hill and your friend was throwing that tear gas, do you remember if there were any other classmates or students that you were with?

[Steven Bauer]: No the people I was with—that was the only person as I recall. And I didn’t do it, I didn’t want to touch that thing. And they were still—they were shooting it, and they were on the midst of coming towards us and then going up the hill. And then right after that, I mean it was serious, you were scared, and we ran like hell, as fast as we could.

[Interviewer]: Do you recall when you learned that there were deaths, casualties, and those who were wounded?

[Steven Bauer]: Yes, of course you didn’t have social media, you didn’t have cell phones, somebody had a AM radio when we got back, they closed the school, told everybody to go home, I had a VW Bug, I remember getting into it, and I went through every red light, there was—everybody was—you know, getting in their homes by that time, because there was rumors that Guardsmen were killed, you know, there was rumors that somebody had a gun shooting at the Guardsmen, I mean there was all kinds of things, and I can honestly tell you, I didn’t see even a rock thrown, maybe, but nothing vivid in my memory. I went, “Wow, somebody’s throwing a rock back at  them,” I mean, and there was definitely no gun shots that I heard beforehand when I left the scene. So that, right after that, that’s when I went home. It seemed like the town went under martial law and then we were locked down. I think it was you couldn’t go out after 6 o’clock or 9 o’clock.

[Interviewer]: When you heard on the news about the four students that were killed and the nine wounded, do you remember, like, “It was actually people who died,”or—?

[Steven Bauer]: Yes, yes. I mean, and that’s the biggest thing after—I mean it solidified, I think, by that evening, that it was four students, Dean Kahler was injured, and I remember him vividly when I came back, because I went to Kent State in ’73 and I remember him in a wheelchair. He had this beautiful long red hair and red beard and I’m friends with him on Facebook but I’ve never personally met him, but I remember him when I got back and I just remember all the people wounded, and just so thankful that we did not go up that hill, and I didn’t go to Vietnam (laughs), and I didn’t go to Canada. (Laughs)

[Interviewer]: So, since May 4, and as you look at all the time that has passed, we’re coming up on 50 years soon, do you think your views of what occurred has remained the same, do you think your views have changed over time, and, if so, in what ways?

[Steven Bauer]: I think as far as right wing, left wing, liberal, conservative, you know, I’m conservative in some ways, but my views haven’t changed, I think, I’m more liberal. I didn’t wanna go to Vietnam. I didn’t think it was my patriotic duty, for that war, anyway. Which is a lot different after September 11th where, you know, it pissed people off and people enlisted. So, my views are still probably more liberal, my views definitely on the governor, the mayor, and calling the National Guard and loaded weapons was a big mistake and everybody knows that now, and it was just a tragedy that nobody had to pay for. I mean, I think the victims got a few thousand—I don’t know how much they got, which never would replace the life. I think that the aftermath of that is in your head the rest of your life.

[Interviewer]: Do you think it changed—just if you could go in a little bit more, if it changed you in any way?

[Steven Bauer]: Yes, it does because it makes you, not anti-government, but definitely now (laughs) but you’re just more sensitive to right wing politics, more sensitive to people lying, and just, you know, the whole process of how somebody gets elected and their views, and then I definitely have a view of people that dodged the draft, that some of them I think, probably a good way, but I definitely think whoever this president is, him dodging the draft was cowardly. You know, just awful. So, that left an impression in my mind that, “Hey, I did it,” after going through this and being, you know, more liberal at that time, and I have the same views now, I think, as I did then. Of course, I’ve been Democrat my whole life but I voted for a Republican before, too.

But definitely the impression of Kent State, the Burns thing of the Kent State deal on PBS, I mean that thing was unreal, anybody from the ‘60s and ‘70s that watch that, very emotional, and then when it has the—goes to the Kent State, you’re like, “Wow.” And it all comes back, you know. So it’s an everlasting thing in your mind. When people ask me, I was in sales for 40 years for high tech sales, you know, computer software. I’ve been to different sales school, and they’ll ask you, “What is the biggest thing that happened in your life?” Well, I say that. The Kent State massacre. And they go—people that remember go, “Wow, you were there,” and I go, “Yeah,” I mean, I ran the other way. Definitely when people ask, and then a lot of people want to know the details, you know the Q&A of it, and the outcome, the aftermath, same questions as here. I think it’s better to talk about it than to keep it hidden, just like any tragedy that you were close to, you know.

[Interviewer]: Well, at this point, I would like to know if there’s anything that I may not have asked you that you think is important to share at this point in time.

[Steven Bauer]: No, I think we’ve been over the whole scenario of those four days, what happened to me with my friend, was again, a real tragic thing. And then myself going through the military, which was probably the best thing that ever happened to get out of a small Midwestern town, and, again, once I got out of the service, boom I was out of here. So I just came back to Kent after 40 some years of being away in 2015. So, it’s great to be back in Kent. It’s great seeing the college so prosperous and growing, and the best thing, there’s more restaurants here now instead of dingy old bars like it was in the ‘60s and ‘70s, but it’s just a fabulous place. I enjoy living and being retired in a college town.

[Interviewer]: Well, at this point in time, I would like to just say thank you very much for participating in the May 4 Oral History Project, I really enjoyed speaking with you today Mr. Bauer, and that concludes our interview.

[Steven Bauer]: Thank you very much. ×