Sharon Rapaport Fineman, Oral History

 

Recorded: February 11, 2020

Interviewed by Kathleen Siebert Medicus

Transcribed by the Kent State University Research & Evaluation Bureau

 

[Interviewer]: This is Kathleen Siebert Medicus speaking on Tuesday, February 11, 2020, and I am in Special Collections and Archives in the University Library Building on the Kent Campus. For the May 4 Kent State Shootings Oral Histories Project, we are recording an interview over the telephone today. Could you please state your name for the recording?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Sharon Rapaport Fineman.

 

[Interviewer]: Okay, thank you. Do you mind if I call you Sharon during the interview?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Oh, please.

 

[Interviewer]: Oh, great, thanks. Sharon, thank you so much for taking the time to meet with me today over the phone and record your memories of May 4, 1970, I really appreciate it. [00:00:46] If I could begin with just some very brief information about you, your background, so we can get to know you a little better. Could you tell us where you were born and where you grew up?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: I was born in Dayton, Ohio, and we moved to Cincinnati, where I did elementary and high school. At that time in my life, I wanted to be an elementary school teacher. My cousin had gone to Kent and she really liked it. And I knew I did not want to go to The Ohio State, because it was just too big.

 

I got accepted to Kent in October of my senior year and I was thrilled because I could play the rest of the year and all I had to do was pass and [unintelligible]. So, that was a great senior year for me. And I wanted to leave home and I was looking forward to going to Kent. I could not wait for school to start. And my very nice father drove me that three and a half hours to Kent. I was annoyed that I was in Terrace Hall.

 

[Interviewer]: Oh, why is that?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Well because Terrace Hall was actually a dump, even when I was there.

 

[Interviewer]: Oh, okay.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: But, you know, I made the best of it. And I had two other roommates in the room. And that was one of the first times that I dealt with anti-Semitism. When my roommate from the farm of Ohio said to me, “Where are your horns?” And I said, “What!?” And she explained to me that all Jewish people have horns. And my other roommate and I said, “You have to leave. You cannot stay. Get out.” So, we threw her out and I said to myself, Welcome to school. And—

 

[Interviewer]: Did she move to another room, then?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Oh yeah, yes, she did. And I don’t actually think she ever finished the first quarter of school. I think she left. But it was interesting. We found school, my freshmen year, to be quite social. And I found that when I went to the library, I couldn’t study there because I had made too many friends, which was interesting.

 

[Interviewer]: [00:03:33] And the library at that time was in Rockwell Hall, correct?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Oh yeah, that’s true, it was. Yeah.

 

[Interviewer]: And there was a big open study area, am I correct? So, lots of people in one place.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yeah, very convenient to talk. And socialize.

 

[Interviewer]: Yeah, I understand people met their spouses there, you know, like that was a place to meet someone and then get married someday.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Right, yeah. And I didn’t meet—well, to go back, I pledged a sorority. I pledged Alpha Phi and I joined Alpha Phi. And that was a very interesting experience for me, where I met a lot of friends, and enjoyed the whole experience.

 

My cousins, on May 4th, in Cleveland, were getting married. So, I went to the ceremony and they drove me back, actually. And my cousin said to me, “If you get arrested, just call.” And I had heard that the ROTC Building burned and the campus was a mess.

 

[Interviewer]: You were away the weekend of May second and third, you were up in Cleveland at a wedding, okay.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yes. So, I had a boyfriend at the time, and he was quite into the protesting. And I knew he was going to be out and about into the protesting. So that night, we pretty much stayed in Terrace Hall. They really told us not to leave.

 

[Interviewer]: On Sunday night?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yes. But I remember walking around campus. You know, back then we had hours. Let’s all remember that.

 

[Interviewer]: Right, so your dorm had a curfew. You had to be in by a certain time.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: I think it was twelve [midnight]. And, you know, everybody was anti-establishment. We were anti- this and anti- that. So, these things going on on campus kind of made sense.

 

[Interviewer]: [00:06:09] Can you maybe give us a visual picture of what you were seeing on Sunday when you got back?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: There were National Guard lined up on Main Street with their guns pointed at Terrace Hall. I still have that in my mind.

 

[Interviewer]: Did you have any difficulty getting into the city of Kent, driving from Cleveland? Was there—

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: No, not at all.

 

[Interviewer]: Okay. Good. Anything else? Did you literally go straight into the dorm? Did you walk around campus at all?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: I probably walked around campus. I was kind of annoyed that I had missed all the excitement. Because I pretty much just stayed on campus all the time. Because for the one time I leave—and things, look what happens! Yeah.

 

[Interviewer]: But you had a family obligation, yeah, what can you do?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Right, yeah.

 

[Interviewer]: [00:07:07] Did your boyfriend have a lot of stories to tell about what he experienced over the course of the weekend?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: He did, yes.

 

[Interviewer]: Was he pretty upset?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: He was very much into protesting. So, he thought it was kind of cool, the protest.

 

[Interviewer]: Were you—so, you mentioned the Guard with weapons and they were pointed at your dorm, so that must have been pretty frightening, pretty shocking for you, especially—you hadn’t been there all weekend, to suddenly see that.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Right. But people told me what happened. And people told me they brought in the National Guard. And, I said, Okay.

 

[Interviewer]: [00:07:56] If we could step back a tiny bit, does anything stick out in your memory, maybe, from earlier that spring, where things felt different on campus than they had in the fall, maybe? Or the mood in your classes? Is there anything that just sticks out in your memory from that spring quarter, earlier?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: No, not really. I don’t think there was anything unusual.

 

[Interviewer]: Okay, yeah. You were busy with your classes, with the sorority, with your social life.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Right. And I was having a good old time. And so, it was fine with me. I didn’t really think this was serious. I mean, I just thought, The war’s escalating, we are college students, we don’t like this. But this, too, shall pass. I was very wrong.

 

[Interviewer]: Yeah, well, a lot of people, I guess, absolutely. [00:08:58] So maybe, what’s the next thing you remember from the next morning? The day of the shootings, May 4?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Well, I remember that we were going to go to class. I had a class in Bowman Hall, and I was going to walk to class with some of the people in my dorm. And we were told don’t go, don’t go out. And I really didn’t understand why. I knew—I think my boyfriend and I had talked and he said he would be out-and-about. And I was going to go to class.

 

[Interviewer]: Okay, yeah. Do you remember who told you not to go out? Was that your resident advisor?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yes, the resident advisor.

 

[Interviewer]: Okay. So, do you think a lot of people in your dorm were following that and staying put?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yes. I actually do.

 

[Interviewer]: What do you remember next?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: I remember somehow we heard about the shootings. And I think, at that point, we walked out. And then we were told, “Go home, the campus is closing.” And I thought, How am I going home? You know, what am I going to do? So, I had some friends who I knew lived in Cleveland, and we said, “Well, let’s go to Cleveland.” I’ll go to my cousin’s house. So, we started walking and we thought, Well, someone’s going to pick us up.

 

[Interviewer]: Okay, so wait a minute. So, you left Terrace Hall after you heard about the shootings, to kind of see what was going on outside?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yes.

 

[Interviewer]: And what did you see? Were there still a lot of people? Were people dispersing?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: There were a lot of people around. But it was very somber, it was very sad. And everyone kept saying, “They’re closing the campus, we’re going to have to leave. Campus is closing. We’re going to leave.”

 

[Interviewer]: And were National Guard telling you to leave?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: They were there. No, I didn’t ever interact with the National Guard. I never said anything to them, and they said nothing to me.

 

[Interviewer]: So, then you had to go back in your dorm and pack a suitcase or whatever, get your books.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yeah. And I remember, all these years ago, I had a turtle, and I left my turtle. And when I came back, what about a month after that, my turtle was alive.

 

[Interviewer]: What!?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: And I was so happy. So, I took him home with me.

 

[Interviewer]: You had a pet turtle in your dorm room, who survived a month without being cared for?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Right, yeah. Isn’t that amazing?

 

[Interviewer]: That’s amazing.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Now, I do have to admit that, eventually, we went home to Cincinnati. And my mother told me, “You can’t go back.”

 

[Interviewer]: Oh, okay. Back to Kent State for college?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Can’t go back to Kent. And I said, “Oh yes I am.” And we had—our professors sent us work. We actually had to do work, annoyingly. And I wore my Kent State t-shirt every single day. I was a proud Kent State student.

 

[Interviewer]: So, you were getting homework assignments in the mail from your professors so that you could finish the quarter, your freshmen year?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Right, yes. I got good grades that quarter.

 

[Interviewer]: Good, good for you!

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: That was nice.

 

[Interviewer]: [00:13:03] So how did you get up to Cleveland that day? You said you, did you hitchhike?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Well, this is interesting. My boyfriend said he picked us up and drove us to my cousin’s house. Honestly, I don’t remember that. I just remember that we’d gone to the Rapid Transit and we took the Rapid Transit to my cousin’s house. So, I’m not sure.

 

[Interviewer]: Interesting.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yeah, yes.

 

[Interviewer]: Maybe he drove you part way and then you took the Rapid Transit?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: He might have. You know how the memories change?

 

[Interviewer]: Oh yeah, definitely.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yeah, so I’m not sure.

 

[Interviewer]: You don’t have any memory of finding him, getting into his car, and getting a ride out of town?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: I just remember that we were walking down Main Street. And we figured—I was with my friend, Debbie—and we figured somebody’s going to pick us up and somebody would take us to Cleveland. So, we really weren’t that concerned, we knew we’d get picked up.

 

[Interviewer]: So, you weren’t hitchhiking, per se, with signs?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yes, yeah.

 

[Interviewer]: [00:14:35] What was it like when you got home, I mean you mentioned that conversation with your mother, were there other discussions with your family about what had happened on campus? They were obviously not happy, they were upset. You know, you were potentially in danger yourself.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: I really did not want to get into a discussion. I said I was going back and I said to my father, “I am going back.” And that was the end of the discussion.

 

And I was with my friends who had gone to the University of Cincinnati, had gone to Ohio State. And we talked a lot about what happened.

 

[Interviewer]: So, you had friends that summer, you could talk it through with.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Right, I talked it through with them. We were scared, because stuff had gone on at Ohio State. I mean, stuff went on everywhere. So, everybody knew my friend who had gone to University of—no, Washington University in St. Louis—had a picture of her swinging on the gate, and it made it to the Cincinnati newspaper. So, we were—

 

[Interviewer]: And that was during a protest on their campus?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yes. But they had their share of things.

 

[Interviewer]: [00:16:13] Are there any other memories from that summer that stick out?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Well, I could not—yes, I remember when we got permission to come back to get our stuff.

 

[Interviewer]: And get your turtle.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yeah, get my turtle. And my father was just so great. We drove back, we got the stuff, we said goodbye there, everyone. And we left.

 

[Interviewer]: Were there any friends that you were saying goodbye to when you picked up your stuff that maybe weren’t going to come back? Or did you—

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: You know, I don’t know. I’m not sure. But everybody—when I came back that fall, everybody was still—came back.

 

[Interviewer]: Your circle of friends?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yes.

 

[Interviewer]: [00:17:14] Maybe can you paint a little picture for us of what it was like that fall? How were things different from your freshmen year?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Well, I moved out of Terrace Hall. And I moved into the sorority house. It was like moving into the closet. And I stayed there for a quarter. And I thought the campus was very somber. A lot of talk about the death and the dying and the shooting and the Ohio National Guard and Governor Rhodes. And we talked a lot about it. I think it was on everyone’s mind. And that May 4fourth, we had a walk, a candlelight walk. And we participated in that.

 

[Interviewer]: So, you were—you participated in the first vigil in 1971?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yeah.

 

[Interviewer]: That must have been a very moving experience.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Oh, extremely. But I have to say, it felt good to be able to be with people and not hear, “You went to Kent State?” That I heard in Cincinnati. So, I liked being there.

 

[Interviewer]: Yeah. Had you done a lot of telling people what happened when you were home in Cincinnati? That was something you were always having to do?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Not really. I just said I went to a school where they shot—students were shot. Governor Rhodes has to go. I was a really big, “Get rid of Governor Rhodes.”

 

[Interviewer]: [00:19:03] Is there anything else from that first anniversary of the shootings, May 1971, that you remember participating in or seeing?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Anything that the school did, I participated in. But I remember there was homecoming, there was football, there was—I joined the All-Campus Programming Board and there were things going on. So, campus really got back. And I, after—I did not go back to Cincinnati for Thanksgiving or the winter break and I went to Cleveland with my family. And I just—I moved to what was known as Small Group Housing. And we had a lovely dorm room. That was really nice. And I was living with some of my sorority sisters. And we enjoyed being there.

 

[Interviewer]: Yeah, those were newer dorms at the time.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: At the time, yeah. And that was a great place to be.

 

[Interviewer]: Were you still in your same major, at that point?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: I was still going to be an elementary school major. And we went—we did a lot of observations at the campus school. And I thought, Oh, wouldn’t this be a nice place to teach? And then, I was going to student teach in—I was going to do—see, I did a kindergarten student teaching and a first-grade student teaching. I needed a car. So, my very nice father got me a car. So, I did go home at some point to get—to drive the car back. And I got a job at O’Neil’s Department Store. Remember O’Neil’s?

 

[Interviewer]: Yeah, I’ve heard of it.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yeah, so I—it’s probably not even there anymore.

 

[Interviewer]: It’s changed names.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: So, I was—you know, I was so happy and content to be in Kent, that it was fine with me.

 

[Interviewer]: [00:21:26] So, you were doing some work at the—what was called the University School, which was the whole, kindergarten through twelfth grade at the time, right?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: You know, I don’t remember, I was just really going to be elementary school.

 

[Interviewer]: You were early elementary?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Right. And so then, I did a kindergarten student teaching in Ravenna, Ohio, with two other girls. And said, Oh, this is not for me. Oh, kindergarten is not for me. And then I did a student teaching in Akron, in a big, old inner-city school. First grade, had a wonderful teacher, loved it.

 

But then, I decided—there was a child in my class named Jared. And Jared, who I will never forget, didn’t get what I was teaching when it came to doing the reading. And I remember asking the teacher, “What am I doing that he isn’t going to get what I’m doing?” And her comment was, “Teach to the middle of the class. If you want, if you care about students like him: special ed.” And then a special education teacher was born. So, at that point, I decided graduate school and special ed.

 

And I went—to go back, I did go home the summer of my sophomore year, to travel to Europe with a friend of mine. And we traveled, you remember the backpacks? And the Eurail passes? And we traveled through Europe. And, then I went back to school for my junior year.

 

[Interviewer]: Okay.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: So, all is good with me.

 

[Interviewer]: [00:23:36] When did you graduate from Kent State?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: I graduated in March. Well, because I stayed in school and took some classes in the summer, we left Small Group Housing and we moved to College Towers. Apartment 219A.

It was the positive absolutely best. I was with four sorority sisters and we became friends and we cooked together, we went shopping together. I remember I learned to cook, I learned to bake. It was like a little home.

 

[Interviewer]: That was your senior year?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yes, my, yes. And we made friends with everyone down the hall. And we just were having a good old time. So, I did spend my junior—the year going into my senior year—on campus in the apartment.

 

[Interviewer]: Oh, I see, junior. Okay.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: And I loved being at Kent in the summer, it was great.

 

[Interviewer]: Yeah. Little quieter, probably.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: A little bit, but we still had—it was still nice. And, at that point, my boyfriend and I had broken up, but we remained friends. And I became a little sister to his fraternity and I was very social.

 

[Interviewer]: [00:25:14] So, then you graduated in ’74?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: I finished in 1974, in March, I finished my requirements. We were going to move to Atlanta, but I was waiting for a couple people to graduate. So, I started substitute teaching in Akron. And I was in inner-city Akron and working every day substituting. And I thought, If I don’t move to Atlanta, I’m going to go to graduate school here at Kent. But it worked out that we moved to Atlanta. And I found that, at that point in 1974, if you went to certain schools, they would pay for you to become a special education teacher. So, I did. But I have to say that I moved, got married and moved to New York and taught, but I am telling you every May fourth I got the books out, I talked to my students, and it was a very significant part of my life.

 

When my boyfriend at the time reemerged, and came back into the world, he became sober and everything, and he called me, and I said, “Oh my gosh, you’re not dead?” I really thought he was dead.

We call each other every May fourth. We text each other every May fourth. That was a very significant trauma in our life.

 

[Interviewer]: When you say he kind of fell off the map, disappeared, when did that happen? Was that right after the shootings?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Once I moved to Atlanta, I didn’t care, I didn’t care. But I figured if he wanted to get in touch with me, he would. So, it wasn’t until I met my husband in Atlanta—we got married in Atlanta, then we moved to New York—did I hear from him. And we’re going to see each other again. We’ve seen each other throughout the years, and we’ll see each other again on campus.

 

[Interviewer]: Are you both planning to come for the 50th Commemoration?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yes, and today I sent a letter to Kent asking, “Why is Jane Fonda speaking?”

I am not happy that Jane Fonda is speaking, and I will not go to that event. I think that sometimes the May 4th celebration, or commemoration—

 

[Interviewer]: Commemoration, yeah.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: —or whatever, kind of got off—kind of went off the deep end sometimes. And that was very annoying to us.

 

[Interviewer]: Have you come to several over the years, over the course of the years?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Because I had family in Cleveland, and people had birthdays and people got older, we—I brought my husband to campus probably twice, and we walked the walk and I showed him things.

 

[Interviewer]: Is he planning to come with you?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yes.

 

[Interviewer]: [00:29:03] Is there anything else that you’d like to share with us about sort of the impact that those events have had on you over the course of your whole life? Working with students in your career, in your personal life?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: I think the impact of May 4th made me a better person, made me think about things, made me realize that things can happen.

 

And just the whole—being at Kent really got me out of a situation that I wanted to get out of, and it provided me security, it provided me safety, and it provided me a place to learn from.

 

[Interviewer]: Being at college?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Yes. And I’ve told students about Kent, here. And they think it’s so far away.

 

[Interviewer]: And remind me where you are right now?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: White Plains, New York.

 

[Interviewer]: Oh right. We’re not that far.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Thirty-two minutes north of New York City, on the train. I thought Kent provided me with everything. And I had great student teaching. I may not have enjoyed it, but it was a very good experience. You know sometimes you have to see what you don’t want to do to know what you want to do.

 

[Interviewer]: Absolutely. [00:30:41] Is there anything else you wanted to talk about that we haven’t covered so far?

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: I’m just very happy that there is going to be a 50th Commemoration for May 4th. I think it’s very important to remember all that has happened.

 

[Interviewer]: Sharon, thank you so much for, again, taking the time and sharing all these stories and memories with the May 4 Oral History Project, I really appreciate it.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: Thank you for doing it.

 

[Interviewer]: Thank you.

 

[Sharon Rapaport Fineman]: I appreciate that. And I’ll be in Kent in May. Thank you so much.

 

[Interviewer]: I’ll stop the recording there.

 

 

[End of interview]

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